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Understanding the Symbolic Nature of "Promise"
Rings
Promise Rings are quite
common, but not so many understand exactly what they
are. They are particularly popular with the youth of
our society and it is important that any persons considering
exchanging Promise Rings have some understanding of
what they symbolize.
So what are Promise Rings, and what
do they mean?
At it's simplest, Promise Rings are
a symbol of a promise made between 2 people. However
it is important to understand that it is usually not
appropriate to exchange rings to seal any promise, or
that Promise Rings may well not be the correct rings
to use to seal that promise.
There are other types of rings which
symbolize a promise made between 2 people. What is an
Engagement Ring but a ring symbolizing a promise made
between 2 people? An engagement has no legal force like
a marriage does. It is just an agreement made between
the parties that they will, at some time in the future,
get married.
And so an Engagement Ring is, in effect,
a Promise Ring, except that it symbolizes a very specific
type of promise. It is also possible to exchange pre
engagement rings as well. These are also a type of Promise
Ring, promising that the 2 people will become engaged
at some time in the future. These rings are often exchanged
where, due to the age of one or both of the parties,
an engagement may be premature at this stage.
A Promise Ring can symbolize any promise,
there are no formal rules governing what types of promise
they symbolize. However it is important to understand
that for Promise Rings to have real meaning they must
be used only to seal a promise of a particularly serious
nature between 2 people. A promise where both of the
parties fully understand the nature of the commitment
that they make, and both understand the seriousness
of their promise.
It is important that they both understand
the exact nature of the promise made between them. There
is no point in exchanging rings where there is no clear
understanding of exactly what it is that is being promised,
so before any promise is made and rings are exchanged
both people should spend some quiet time together discussing
exactly what commitment is to be made between them,
and how it will work.
Make sure that both are totally in agreement
with the terms of the promise made, that both understand
what is to happen in the future in pursuance of that
promise, and when.
It is usually better that both write
the agreement down and keep a copy. That way there can
be no disagreement in the future. It can also be useful
if possible, to inscribe the Promise Ring which is to
be exchanged with a small inscription that encapsulates
the nature of the promise. Obviously this is not easy,
but, for example, the inscription of a specific date
on a ring can be a clear reminder of what is to happen
when.
It is of course possible just to exchange
rings for any reason at all, and this is often done.
However a Promise Ring holds a more serious commitment
than this. A friendship ring may often be a more appropriate
exchange for many young couples. This signifies a closeness
between the couple but doesn't necessarily seal a specific
agreement about the relationship for the future.
A common type of Promise Ring is one
which signifies a promise between 2 young people to
abstain from sexual activity until they are married.
This is a serious commitment and properly the subject
of a Promise Ring, or Purity Ring, as long as both properly
understand exactly what it is that is being promised.
For example, what constitutes "sexual activity"
A Promise Ring is not just for a promise
made between 2 people. It can also be made by one person
with "themselves" or "God" depending
on their beliefs. For example many promise purity to
God without extending that promise to any other person
in particular.
So, before you consider wearing a Promise
Ring, make sure that it signifies something that is
of extreme seriousness to you, or to both of you. Make
sure you understand the nature of the commitment, the
exact details, and any time scales envisioned.
Only then can you confidently go ahead
and display that promise to the world.
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